This blog has gone in a different direction than originally intended. Instead of it being instructional or a forum for the older person, it has become the ruminations of my life, and I realize that I am on a greased pole to geezerhood.
If I had a bigger porch, I would have a rocker on it and sit out and whittle little animals out of soap.
It’s going to be a short ride to waving a cane and yelling, “Get off my lawn, you damn kids!” I’m kind of looking forward to it.
When I started this blog, it was with the intention of bringing about awareness. I wanted writing it to be a therapeutic tool. I wanted to share the reality of retirement and its challenges with others, and perhaps hear other experiences. I wanted to let others know that they have not been put out to pasture, that life is not done with them yet.
The last ten years or so have been brutal, and I got so tired of trying. I was so drained, comatose, with not one shred of fight left. Gone, or so I thought.
However, I was blessed, so very blessed with support and love. Some of my loved ones were always there for me. Some, not so much. It has been a learning experience, and not always a good one. No matter how jaded you think you have become, you find that you can still be devastated by someone’s cruelty, judgement, or abandonment. For your own protection, ennui becomes your friend.
Whenever that has happened to me, I actually am embarrassed. I think I have been through enough to know better, to trust less, to question more, to not be tricked again. And yet, I can still be brought up short by something I witness or hear of or experience myself.
I am not much wiser in my dotage, but I do know this. For all the physical and mental problems you may face, FIGHT. And keep on fighting.
If you look, you will find that you do have love in your life. I hope that includes love of self, and THAT, my friend, is what is worth fighting for.